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Cast

Main Characters

Stan – The standard lead character and main troublemaker.
Vera – The feisty female who also works at the local metaphysical store.
Victor – Instigator of many problems and the boy who “isn’t all there.”
Winston – Big geek with trivial knowledge about pointless topics to spare.

Supporting Cast

Futhark Kid Asa – Mysterious and silent, the Futhark Kids are indescribable.
Candy, a Cheerleader for Christ – Do a cheer, you know you want to! Doesn’t Christ make you want to do the splits on your local altar too?! Jump for joy, cause Candy is here to cheer you on to salvation!
Craig – Follower of the Spiritual Fish, and overall plotting and scheming pathetic moron.
Cthulhu – netherworld elder god with a eye bent on destroying the world, or eating it’s inhabitants… whichever comes first.
The Fairies – Victor’s spirit guides. They love to torment his tortured soul with their sweet and innocent goodness!
Fina – Crazed cat or plotting pussy? Either way she’ll scratch your eyes out before you can blink, or cuddle up with you if you give her some cat nip. PS: don’t try to smoting her.
Fundie – The good old neighborhood Christian who can’t wait to show you the love of Jesus.
Jacob, a Clown for Christ – Come on kids, Jesus is Fun! Think about learning all those important biblical topics like death, torture, pain and resurrection from a friendly neighborhood Clown for Christ!
Johnnie – Enlightened a little too much, Johnnie is the leader is a member of the local sect of the Pagan Spiritual Tradition of the Spiritual Fish.
Kay – Feisty and demanding, she’s a woman on a mission! Keeper of Vast Knowledge of the Spiritual Fishie she is out to reap vengeance for those slain in the name of the Fish. If only there actually were Spiritual Fish martyrs…
Larry – a word balloon formed from a poor sentence, which now haunts Victor… and often hangs out with Fina.
Linda – She’s looking for love… with Jesus! We forewarn you though, don’t ask her what she uses her crucifix for. Let’s just say, she’s defiantly very close to God.
Saint Grand High Markus, Ordained Ceremonial Magician of the XXXII Order of Apsu – Many ask him why he has such a long name (he won’t be addressed by anything shorter). Don’t worry, it’s an an inner order mystery, and you can never begin to fathom to understand such power. Either way, he never takes off his robe and he doesn’t know anything beyond Ceremonialism!
Nate – A simple man humble in his endeavors, Nate is a humble Chaos magician who seems to understand more the he lets on. Who knew chaos could be so smart, or cute! Nate also helps in running Malaka’s Apothecary.
Nick – A proud African-American pagan (gasp! yes! they do exist!) who’s fond of Hoodoo, hurling curses at the drop of a hat, as well as Buddhism.
Futhark Kid Othala – Mysterious and silent, the Futhark Kids are indescribable.
Futhark Kid Perth – Mysterious and silent, the Futhark Kids are indescribable.
the Pope – He’s white, he’s papal, and his hat is bigger then his body! It’s the Pope in all his infallible glory!
Reiki Master – Conjuring the awesome power of the Reiki he is able to mend bone, cure disease, and cook a hot-dog.
Tina DeValve – Atheistic and crazed woman who was once the Boob Vampire. Now plotting her return to power as an undead overlord using Twinkies, Ho-Hos, and some matches.
UU of 8 – He’s lost all identity, personality, religion, sex, gender, sexuality, and spirituality… he’s Unitarian! And you better steer clear or you might become one too!
Vincent – Boyfriend of Stan, Vincent has sharp hair to match his sharp wit. Vincent will cut you down before you even get to shake his hand. Don’t worry though… he means it in the most loving way possible.

Locations

Neo Aquarius & Other Planets – It is indeed your magickal superstore! Vera works there, and it’s often frequented by the least informed Pagans imaginable. How does Vera put up with it? Lots of caffeine.
The Jesus Fishery – A local Pagan bar and grill. Serving fish, burgers and Enya, open all night!
The Gender Blender – A local gay bar with pinache! Serving cocktails, cocks and tails this place has it all! Owned and run by Stan and Vincent, this place is always jumping. Go ahead and grab a drink from that red haired bartender, or watch the blue haired one dance a dance, or perhaps a little drag!
Malaka’s Apothecary – A fantastic apothecary carrying a full assortment of herbs,oils, incense, and potions – both recipies ancient and modern. Nate runs the counter, but the mysterious Malaka runs the shop from behind the scenes.